Murder Moist Foul

I like trying new things. Preferably things that won’t result in my death or dismemberment, so the excitement factor may be a tad low, but hey, I’m a girl looking for cheap thrills.

I got brave one day and decided to try the steam room at the gym. The thing about this gym is that people are frequently complaining to the management that partrons are naked in the locker rooms. To which the management replies “Deal with it.” Except much in a nicer less bitch-tastic way.

Being reassured that being naked was not frowned upon by the establishment I tossed my clothes in a freebie give away bag from school and hopped into the steam room. I sat on a towel in the corner letting the steam envelope me. It was relaxing bliss, like a long shower without the terror that the hot water could run out at any moment (I can’t count the times hubris has left me a frozen Jeniece-cicle wrapped in a towel).

My utopia of steamy goodness was interupted when another women came in. I couldn’t see past the fog, but I heard her. She timidly called “Is anyone in here?”

“I am! I’m in the top corner. You’re not going to run into me or anything.”

I was about to lean back and find my zen again….when a face appeared in front of me. A fully clothed face. Did I mention that I’m stark naked sitting on a towel? Because I am.

And this woman is fully dressed and wearing a shower cap.


She sticks around to get a good look then retreats through the wall of steam. It’s then that another woman comes in, says nothing, just sits.

My eyes felt like they had fogged over. It’s so quiet and my brief encounter with the shower cap has left feeling on edge. It’s then I realize….

This is the perfect place to commit a murder.

One expertly placed rag of chloroform would render the victim silent. Its not like anyone would see it happen. It’s the perfect crime.

I hightailed it out of there sans towel and have yet to return.

Because god knows what was under that shower cap. Murder stuff thats what.


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